Some people love photography. Then they do lots of photography. And then they are eventually known as photographers.
Some people love to study. Then they read a lot, mug a lot, study a lot. And then they are eventually known as geniuses, geeks or nerds.
Then there’s me. what am i?
On the way back home today i was thinking about this. Since when did I start on this journey? Since when did i stop fighting that notion and embrace this thing of myself? i remember back then, i really wasn’t very good. Not that Im damn good now, but I was really novice then. But it was okay; I was still quite good (compared to my friends, the people around me). I wasn’t all that self-aware.
But now, almost 8 years on, i’ve picked up photoshop, indesign and a load of design-esque labels, work requests and attention. most of my works are pretty decent. decent in that they cause no dismay. they’re mostly good. i’ve improved heaps. i’ve moved from graphic design to print design. i’ve expanded my horizons from doing class newsletters to doing websites, publications, posters, even recently photography.
but even as I move, as I grow; I can’t help but ask myself: where is this headed? Is this the something I really wanna do? Do i do design for the sake of beauty, or is it that the compliments I get enchant me so much it’s like an addiction? Something I hold on to for egoistic security? Something that I can base on to say “hey i know XXX is good at XXX, but i’m also very zai at design what”?
The most recent school assignment for 206 is an example. In short, my photography sucks, but my design is zai.
But so what? Even since I knew I got into NCTU i really didnt care about my grades already. My only and perhaps biggest gripe is that according to my tutor my photos kind of sucked. well perhaps I expected to easily do well, given my designer background. i thought visual perception, designer-eye and colour, composition acument and all that stuff will help. well it didn’t.
i guess its not the same. doesn’t translate like that. i realised that photography, like design, requires years and years of practise. its not a formulaic thing that u can “catch” the best shot. it’s not like fishing. its very easy to suck. which is why i now appreciate photographers, good photographers a whole lot more. i guess recently so many of my friends have taken to it, and had pretty nice photos, which led me to think that the sheer quantity of enthusiasts might mean its ‘easy’ enough to be somewhat good. but that’s not true, of course.
i’m a bit embarrassed to actually have thought like that. if someone told me something like that of design, i would slammed that guy flat.
which in a way gives me some security. i mean, perhaps, in this case, a photographer cannot expect to ‘parachute’ right into the design field as expect to be a pro on the first try. the concepts, while similar, does not merely translate. design takes months to learn, years to hone, and you might never even get ‘there’. but of course, that ‘there’ is determined by us. for me, it still isnt it yet. i don’t know how long, i don’t know when, but
that’s why my 206 photo assignment booklet can be so zai, and yet my photos are just not ‘there’.
i don’t think its a question of humility. but more of knowledge and misplaced judgments.
even now, i’m not totally sure i like being known as a designer. its only part of what i do. it’s not me. it’s just a part, though important part, of me. oh wells.
what makes a designer? doing a lot of design? liking design? being asked, very often, to do design?
i think design constitutes a larger way of living life. it’s observing and appreciating things that people don’t normally do.




















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